I like to talk in my OPRAH VOICE!

I love Oprah.  Her pretention... her randomly awesome show themes... and her voice. 

Around 4pm I flip the TV on my desk from CNN to CBS and I start preparing my Oprah voice.  My desk mate Jen seriously hates it when I talk like Oprah. I think it's delightful.

I start saying everyone's names and then get super loud for the last name.  For example John TRAH-VOLT-AH or Mary Kay LE-TOUR-NO!  Some people request that I do it.  Just yell like Oprah across the newsroom.  It makes them feel special.

Why am I talking about Oprah? She recommends this book as a healthy cleanse.

I've always been interested in doing a cleanse, but they scare me.  I don't have the money to the fancy cleanses my BFF Gwynnie is always pimping on her website... and I'm scared of the juice fasts I read about in those magazines that want everyone to be stick thin.  I'm bitchy enough missing one meal, let alone skipping whole foods for a week.

But this book is different.  Instead of cutting out whole foods, you just cut out the Big Bad Five- sugar, alcohol, meat products, caffeine and gluten.  So I'm going to do it. 

I'm still reading the book and checking out the recipes, the author suggests reading it at least once before committing. So in the next couple of weeks I'll go balls to the wall with it.  Well, kind of balls to the wall. 

She's a big proponent of meditation and I'm pretty horrible at getting my brain to stop going long enough to get some sleep... so I don't know how good at meditating I'll actually be... plus I have the attention span of a gnat.

Of course both of those statements probably mean I need to really give meditation a go.  We'll see.

Also consider this a warning for when I get uber bitchy without sugar or caffeine in the future.