I didn't run this week. There will be a lovely blog about my Route 66 Marathon Failure. But today we're all about stripping. Here's some observations.
Firstly, I'm still working on Routine 1 from Carmen Electra's Strippercize. I'll do Routine 2 next week.
-The secret to being sexy is you. So Carmen wants me to add my personality to the stripping. I don't know how sarcasm will help me get tips. Or trips to the Champagne Room.
-The irony that I'm doing fake stripping in hot pink running pants and an old ORU shirt is not lost on me.
-When I'm bent over in the mid crawl Bella will run up and give me a kiss and then run away. Mems says if I do that on a bar men will do the same thing. But they'll just lick my face.
-Stripping is hard. My abs hurt from the constant sucking in my gut and my hips popped like 4 times in various moves.
-I took a break to watch Jennifer "Baby" Grey dance on DWTS with Mems. She asked what I was doing and I told her I was an excellent stripper.
-Her response: "I'm glad you're finally good at something."
-I thought there'd be more boob shimmying.
-If I wanted to I think I'm 30 pounds away from real stripperdom. Tulsa strip bars aren't picky.
-Stripping really does work everthing. My the body roll made my abs burn... the dips boost your butt. Everything but my arms. I may need to learn to work a pole to work my arms. (That's what she said.)
-Mems said she and my mom will come support me. But they're not putting money in G-strings. Well, at least not mine.
-I have no rhythm.